Your entries overwhelmed Right Wing Duck -- when I told him that we had a record number of entries in this week's Captain's Caption Contest, he couldn't believe his ears! And not just his, either ...

Here's RWD on the contest:

"Wow, Captain this was a lot harder than I thought. I
didn't know which one to choose, so I asked the French Embassy for
help. They suggested I surrender. Then I called the UN but they
wouldn't return my calls. So I acted unilaterally - screw the French!
If you guys were liberal I'd worry about hurting your feelings - but
you're not so let me just say this - a lot of you should get
professional help!"

Here are the winners, with or without that vaunted French military alliance:

Captain's Award (Roll Call Edition) - DANEgerus:

All I see is 4 vegetables with 6 ears.

You Have The Conn #1 (Kellogg's Or Post?) - Sligobob:

As so, early in the campaign, the corn meets the flake.

You Have The Conn #2 (Match Game '04) - Tongue Boy:

"Will someone tell Charles Nelson Reilly to quit screaming in my ears?"

You Have The Conn #3 (Don't Squeeze The Charmin) - Steverino:

...and after my economic policies get enacted and you lose your job
and can't afford toilet paper anymore, you can use THESE!

Report To Sick Bay (On The Double) - tied:

Rocat: You'd best butter up, America!!! John Kerry's comin'!!!

Furious: "His'n'Hers -- Batteries not included..."

Special Award: Best use of old and new (Old people are cute) - MDatek:

JF'nK: On the right is Punch and on the left is Judy.
whack-whack
Unidentified Reporter: So could you say this is a metaphor for the
current political climate, the right beating up on the left?
JF'nK: No you Sonuva....It's a f*$kin puppet show. You, Secret Service
guy, make him.... disappear.
Unidentified Reporter: Help, Help, I'm being repressed to the, no....
not the Free Speech Zone!!

Best use of a semi-modern Reference [Beavis] - Thief:

I AM CORNHOLIO! heheh....MY BUNGHOLE IS REPORTING FOR DUTY!...
heheheh...ARE YOU QUESTIONING THE PATRIOTISM OF MY BUNGHOLE? heheh....

Thanks to everyone who entered, and congratulations to the winners! Remember, here at CQ, everyone's a winner -- just some of us have higher winning percentages than others. Comments on this post will remain open, as usual, in order for the winners to gloat, the others to disparage Right Wing Duck's intellect and/or my parentage, and for any other entries submitted just for the sheer enjoyment of amazing your friends and confounding your enemies.

As I mentioned this weekend, your donations continue to flow into the tipjars set up to help me defray the costs of attending the Republican National Convention, and they are much appreciated. You raised about $150 more this past weekend, pushing the total to about two-thirds of the travel expenses for the trip. I'm extremely grateful, and I hope to give everyone their money's worth when I'm at Madison Square Garden for the show. The tipjars will remain on the left sidebar until the convention.

Send me a photograph or an e-mail with a link to a great picture you think should be the subject of our next Caption Contest, and let me know if you'd like to be the guest judge! I'll have another picture for Friday -- so be sure to come back then for the next contest.

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